N is for Neurotypical

N is for Neurotypical.  This is a term that you hear a lot once join the Autism community.  Neurotypical is what an average person is - their brain functions as expected.  Apollo is NOT Neurotypical.  That's not necessarily a bad thing.  In some ways, it's a blessing.  In other ways, it's a curse.  It is amazing to watch Apollo figure things out.  You can almost see the little gears in his head whirring away at speeds that would give you whiplash if you could really see them.  He takes complex problems and figures them out like they were nothing.  Yet, it is also a curse.  This same methodical processing can be all-consuming.  If he sets his mind to a task, he has to complete that task at all costs.  Obviously, this can be a great thing when he is trying to put together a puzzle, or complete his homework, or figure out a problem.  It can be debilitating to him when he is expected to do something not on his to-do list.  It is even worse when the task he focuses on is dangerous to his (or someone else's) well-being or would be otherwise damaging to himself or his surroundings.  When Apollo is in the first situation, he is a virtuoso completing the most gorgeous symphony (or one day he will be!  While this child LOVES music, he needs some work on tone and especially volume control.  For that matter, he needs some guidance on appropriateness and timing as well.  But those will come in time.).  When Apollo is forced to face the latter two situations, he becomes difficult at best and downright impossible at times.  His entire frame of mind goes into panic mode and he shuts down all emotions except utter distress.  You can see it come over him - his eyes blank out, he sets his jaw, balls up his fists and slams them against his ears... and then... he bursts. 

N is for New.  We have shifted his medication back to night time to aid in focus in the mornings as he is still having trouble getting ready in a timely manner.  This is actually a problem for both of my school-age kids.  Orion is slow to focus and his mind jumps everywhere BUT where he needs to be.  Apollo can't pull himself out of his intense focus on one task to complete a series of tasks.  It's frustrating, but we're getting there.  Giving him one of his medications at night causes it to peak in the morning when he is getting ready and gradually fade over the day.  Since he is taking a second medication in the mornings and afternoons to aid with his focus, this seems to be working.  I am anxious to get him off of the double-dose medicine and onto something extended release like his brother.  However, that change cannot come until he turns 6, so for now we are stuck at an impasse.  The doctor won't increase his medications, but with the control of some of his issues, others have made themselves more prominent.  He doesn't melt down as often as he used to, but his melt downs (I should really learn to say shut down, so from here on out, I will refer to his melt downs and shut downs.) are more intensely focused and while easy to predict, they are no easier to redirect.  I am still pushing for testing because something is still causing his distress and the medication isn't addressing it. 

N is for Normal.  Our new normal.  That is learning not only to cope with Apollo's quirks and inevitable moments of total shut down, but also teaching Apollo how to cope on his own.  I haven't had any phone calls from school to let me know of any issues.  He has been routinely bringing home Green faces.  In fact, he has still only had 3 yellows the whole year - and those were from him not sitting in his seat the first two weeks of school.  We have had straight green for 6 weeks now.  His progress report was straight A's.  He loves to read at home, he is infatuated with the calendar and loves teaching math to his little brother (This is the child who taught himself AND my oldest how to add when he was 3 and my oldest was 4.5).  But I am waiting for normal to corrode away and for the quirks to show.  I need for Apollo to be ready to handle life when it doesn't go his way and things are truly out of his control.  For this reason, I am pushing for the testing to go forward.  It is 5 hours of testing to determine if he is on the spectrum and if he is, where he falls.  His therapist has already informed me that he is scary smart and she feels (as do I) that he is likely affected by what used to be diagnosed as Asperger's.  They no longer diagnose Asperger's, but rather the individual is classified as having high-functioning Autism.  I believe there may be more to the puzzle though.  I have suspected Asperger's since he was 3, but I now also suspect Sensory Processing Disorder.  He has found a way to socialize at school - at least I think he has.  He tells me he has friends and he is constantly writing their names and telling me things they do at school.  Whether he is truly friends with them, or whether he is what HE consider to be friends doesn't matter at this point.  But he still doesn't act appropriately in a lot of situations.  He is awkward and goofy and scary smart - this is the part of Apollo that screams Asperger's and thus, the Autism Spectrum.  But he overacts to outside stimuli like thunder, bright lights, weird sounds, being too hot or cold, things touching him and being touched by strangers.  These things in any capacity (and it differs) can send him into a complete tailspin and ruin his entire day.  And yet, some things that SHOULD upset him don't - like when he cut his leg.  He was completely chill where a "normal" child would be screaming their head off and likely would have had to be sedated.  Pain and physical discomfort don't seem to bother him - he is always putting his shoes on the wrong feet.   This part of Apollo screams Sensory Processing Disorder.  And he isn't being treated for EITHER with his medications.  He is being treated for ADD.  However, there is new research to show that SPD can successfully mask itself as ADD or ADHD in a lot of children who may also be suspected of being on the Autism Spectrum.  So even though Apollo appears to be a really complicated enigma of quirks, he may actually be quite normal when all the pieces are considered are treated appropriately.  Maybe not Normal as a dictionary would define it, but really quite normal when all is said and done and the puzzle is complete.